I keep a small circle of friends with whom I am very close. One of the reasons I do not have a big group of friends is my inability to trust friends stemming from a bad experience. Jim was a close friend from my days in high school and campus.
We were quite close, and I trusted him with many of my intimate secrets. In our sophomore year, I started a business outside the university grounds. Jim was good with computers, and I enlisted his assistance with the business that involved computer repair. Jim was so good that in no time, business was booming thanks to his efforts.
I made him an equal partner in the business, and we subsequently split proceeds of the business equally. However, after a while, Jim started changing. He was repeatedly late for work for no apparent reason; he did not meet his deadlines, and generally, his workmanship became shoddy. I suggested he take some time off work to rest, which he did. I thought he would change for the better after the short break, but I was wrong. Jim’s habits got worse than before. He was usually drunk and irritable.
He no longer cared about the quality of his work and severally insulted clients. Much of the business had been centered on Jim’s skills. Eventually, the business went under when Jim sold vital business equipment to fund his drinking sprees.
Betrayal of a friend
In this world, every individual has been let down by a close friend. Friendship is characterized by people’s thoughts, execution and thoughts. The actions define character and intentions in relation to morality, kindness and attitude. In many cases, individuals meet people who care and listen to their issues, problems and provide verbal or physical solutions.
However, some friends forget the bond and leave the people close to them in trouble. It is heartbreaking to have an experience of being let down by a friend. The experience of being let down results in distrust, enmity and breakups. When let down, some individuals hold onto the invisible sphere they used to share with the friends. This entails regretting every event they attended together leading to a feeling of betrayal.
Such emotions may result in taking offence in the disloyalty exhibited by the friend. Experience makes an individual feel empty and live with the feeling that he or she lost something important. Solving the issue of being let down may include two major solutions.
One, the individual should assume everything comes and goes. This helps the person to deal with the pain and facilitates the recovery process. Additionally, the person should be involved in different activities that distract him or her from the realization that they were let down.
We live in a world that is filled with different forms social expectations. Society expects us to conform to laws and norms otherwise we will be branded as non-conformist or defiant. In the same way that society expects us to be someone or something, we also have our own sets of expectations for people that we trust and rely upon. When these people fail to meet our expectations, we react differently. Our reactions typically varies depending on who they are to us or what we have done for them in the past.
Oftentimes, we expect people to respond to us the same way we have responded to them. For example, when we helped out a friend who is need of money, we expect that this friend will also help us out financially or otherwise. When the situation is reversed and we asked the same friend for a favor and that person refuses to help for whatever reason there is, we feel offended.
This is because we have expected our actions to be returned. I have experienced a situation when during my glory days a friend came to me and ask me to help her out because she couldn’t pay for her son’s tuition. I did not have much too, considering that I am a single parent raising three kids on my own. But because I knew how it felt to have to worry about your kids, and I understand her because were in the same boat, I lend her the money she needed. She promised to pay me back but then she didn’t. I did not pressure her to pay because again, like me she is a single mother. But when I needed a favor that was not money-related, and I turned to her knowing she will help me, I was disappointed.
She refuses to even answer my calls. It was disappointing. I learned never to expect.
Definition of friendship
Friendship is not about who you have known the longest or who came first, friendship is about who came and never left.
A person whom you know and have a bond of mutual affection and love can be termed as your friend.Quite often circumstances come where you fail to agree on various issues in life.this may lead to heated arguments and in some extreme incidents, it may culminate into physical exchange of blows and many unprintable insults. However if the bond created between you and this person is real and honest, not even a thousand smacks on the face nor a volume of insults can tear you two apart. Regardless, you may end up not talking to each other for hours, days or even months but when you sit back and realize tat you can never replace the space filled by that person, that is when you come back to your composed and more sensible self an d have a hear of forgiveness and reconciliation and get back to your old buddy.
Being left by a serious friend is not an easy walk in the park as one may perceive. It takes a lot of courage to actually get used not o talking to hat person again and not being able to turn to them in your tribulations and trying moments in life. It feels like an integral part of you has been taken from you and you can’t face life the same way you used to before when that person was there for you in your life.